凯- no header until i got time to make 1

PROJECT WEIGHT LOSS

2009-01-09T09:00:00.000-08:00

PROJECT WEIGHT LOSS HAS BEEN HEREBY OFFICIALLY DECLARED=)

小不点阿卡我

2008-06-20T19:02:00.000-07:00

i know i haven't post for a long time and also haven't been feeling like posting for a long time. now that i got some spare time on my hand, i finally dragged my ass to write something on this blardy empty space=)

For some reason i have been anyhow throwing my tantrum...i don't know what was making me so unhappy. My workload, NS, my growing rely on cig and booze. Work was hell because i keep getting screwed by my bossman for arranging shoots at weird hours and not wanting to take his advice and take up one of his agent. I don't really like the idea of letting someone else dictate my job, share my profit and nag at me whole day long. Though i have the habit of constantly checking my phones, but i seriously dislike them to keep beeping. He allowed me to go without an agent because i still have decent amount of job. But now it dropped and he think it's due to insufficient "lobbying". watever lah. i know my income for 1st half of this year dropped like donno how many hundred percent but life goes on.

NS is also becoming a pain in the ass. my vocation is blardy too slack. i just sleep the whole day off. Though my mum think that it's good because i have insufficient sleep for donno how many years and it's good time to recharge. arrrrG it's driving me crazy. Also NS has robbed me of a golden opportunity. I got a perm job offer somewhere else in the region which pay decent with good promotional opportunity but i can't take it unless i desert. which means i cannot go to nus and i don't want to waste so much money on my studies. for those who don't know, i am saving up for my post grad because architecture degree is nothing without post grad and also for my "wife to be" diamond. all this thing about the diamond came from my somebody not v.close to me but v.nice auntie.

Shit can't post anymore. back to work

Drink Drank but not Drunk

2008-02-09T17:33:00.000-08:00

Last night simply is a drinking night for me. well guess i haven't get out of the chinese new year mood yet=D

went to rae's party before she goes to aust and wow some of the girls there are hot but i am more interested in drinking=X we had our own nsf conner comprising of all the botaks. its kinda cool to be able to have something in common for us to bitch about the whole night. but i pity the rest cause they wouldn't know what we were talking about and that is why we had our own conner=)

seeing that rae is going off to study, i start to hate ns. then i start to hate my mum. if not for her i would be somewhere else right now...and not having to serve and fuck off 2 years later. i want to study....i don wan to serveEeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!

MOS is crazily packed last night so just went in for abit to say hi to some friends and leave. drank like 10 odd shots last night, 4 cans of beer, 3 pints of beer, 1 bottom filled goldfish and 1/2 a graveyard=D tot i would get wasted but heng no. i was half way gone at rae's place from the goldfish. seriously it tasted good think they added cognac or sth like that. good that i decided to go home for a quick shower before the 2nd round for the night if not i think i would be still lying on the street at clarke quay.=X

posting from my itouch

2008-02-02T21:57:00.000-08:00

it has been quite awhile since I updated as I was severely busy with armying so much so that I've only spent 4hours of civilian life in the last 3 weeks. prior to that was rather busy with my work(I got my first paid assignment muahaha). it felt rather good to be able to conceive an idea then sell it and materialize it. the sense of sastisfaction that you are being recognized it blardy sweet=P so much so for my first solo=)
p.s don't understand what I am talking about? can come and ask me on MSN or SMS me I am damn bored in army SMS me pleaseeeeeesss

Army: before enlisting lots of peeps have been telling me how horrifying their ns stinct were. but to my surprise it wasn't like that. either they exaggerated or I am weird. I find it rather fun and enjoyable especially the out field days though I dislike the heat rashes which kept on occuring on me on my 5 day field camp and a milder one when I had my situational test like yesterday and the day before. the pt were nothing compared to most training for sportsmen in school. from what I gathered the training has been much tone down after years of complain from parents and the sudden emphasis on safety during training after the commando drowning some time back. so most of the time it felt like a piece of cake though one should always act as though its damn tough to minimise your physical exhaustion=X please don't call me chao keng cause that is just plainly being smart.

for obese soldiers like myself the standard obstacle course is the main killer though I clear the individual obstacle with ease. I shall update more about it when I practice the whole routine one shot. the stations most fat soldiers died are the low wall, parallel bars, low rope and the monkey bars. yes monkey bars as in the one similar to those at playground. fat soldiers can't do it for nuts and I was called a monkey for being able to do it like twice for those who saw me at it. personally I was rather surprise that I could do the low rope cause for that station I had zero confidence. but with the support from my officer and more than half the company watching I found the strength to go up. guess that what is meant by u don' t know what you can achieve until you tried.

for my next post I will write more about living in the army with people from all walks of life from " ang kong Kia" to smart asses who thinks that they are blardy smart. I shall whine more then. till then this is ky ending his first issue of my army life.=D

sadded

2007-11-16T06:39:00.000-08:00

ARRRGGGG i wanna kill myself for being fat!
just because i am fat i have to miss zouk out. i am not really dieing to go zouk out or what until i saw ARMIN VAN BUUREN will be there!!!! damn it. missed him in kl just because of freaking A's and now this. well at least my uncle got me his album and his autograph=X

well feeling kinda empty now because A's is ending. yayayaya i noe i noe what is A's? its just a small part of life. yeah i screwed it up, so what? no use crying over spilled milk? not for me. i'll like it up clean from the floor=D seriously i did that when i am a kid. muahahahahahaha. really hoped it isn't as bad as i though if not i would have to retake a few subjects new year and that is really shit.

starting work tml morning. yawn sian. should be at mr low's wedding but since its 1st day of official work, well work come 1st though i dread going to the office at such crazy hours. but for a freak of nature like me the working hour is v.suitable=P basically if i go to the office, i go in at latest 7 and i get the hell out by 9+ or 10 then its all free and easy liao. what job is it? tell u for what? let u steal my rice bowl meh=X muahahahhaha

christmas is round the corner! kinda in the mood of christmas this year which i was never in for all my life. for those who get to interact with me for a while will know why yar?=S candy cane for free at cathay wahahahhaha today. damn early lor.....its still a white before its christmas lor. so gan cheong. but i reali like cathay i guess. after it has opened its doors, i stop going to town almost totally unless for shows that doesn't screen at cathay. think its because of the aircon and the smell there. its comfy! it would be even better if they had spinelli there. arrrgggg its the only cafe left where u can drink coffee and smoke at the same time. starbucks smoking area somehow doesn't interest me cause i donno why also. i just don like it=)

< My Name Is Justine > is watchable. it won several awards though for most it would seem boring.

"Beowulf"is shit i think. unless u are dieing to see Angelina Jolie nude, its shit. the nude scene is somehow fake so don keep ur hopes too high cause it look bloody cgi

< Suger & Spice > a jap movie whose lead actor who canes or donno which award. his acting is real good. its not too bad a show though and its in the cosy little theatre 6 at cine.

< The Game Plan > another show by dwayne johnson aka the rock. really i am quite impressed by him not just by his muscles and is WWE. but this guy can act! so far he is stucked on the football field for all his show . in this movie, he end up doing ballet as well. not too bad for starters=D

死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死

2007-11-08T07:18:00.000-08:00

that is the word to describe my a'lvl stint. screwed up pretty bad for maths cause i didn't really prepare for it. chemistry is half screwed. only found that the option that i didn't do is the easiest 1 after finishing everything. idiot rite?

not really disappointed by all these though. after all a good cert doesn't guarantee good money.

gone is my bali and bangkok trip. mama paid for china trip instead=_= like china. yucks. will be spending half the time in chengdu and the rest of it in the scenic region. so i could start using my holiday fund as shopping fund already.

what i want to buy now: psp, new lense, new filters, new camera bag, new bag, a pair of loaffers, plenty of pro films to test out, and lots of other random things.

guess as we grow up money as an incentive start to lose its appeal. mama struck a deal with me that if i get 3As, i will get 3.5k. i suggested that jokingly and she took it for real. excited about it but it doesn't really give me enough kick to mug like crap. gone was the me who will study like its the only reason i live for over something like a game console, new com and etc etc.

splurged my last paycheck away on a projector! yay. can watch movie shiokly at home liao=D
oh ya. i am gonna be stucked to my cock sucking phone till next year when iphone comes out and drop abit. i am getting it for sure. boss have it already and its way way way cool.

How To Detach A Bra

2007-09-13T01:44:00.000-07:00

Bra Removal - The most popular videos are here

Something that i felt all guys need to learn=P

Mug

2007-09-06T11:32:00.001-07:00

It is always interesting to study at mac deep in the night.
There are far more interesting people around than other time of the day. Most importantly they keep me from snoozing=D. Oh yes! trance can keep u awake and u wouldn't get bored with it.

1st: Bunch of monkeys from some church laughing hysterically nonestop for close to 1 and a half hour cause that is how long my latest dose of trance music lasted.
2nd: Amazed at the extent to which people go to kop power at mac
3rd: Cool bunch of malays who are rather retarded. they made a extented straw the length of 2 tables and one of them actually attempted to drink from it. He succeed but was left breathless after.

Mugged quite abit today. rather happy with the progress i made so far. however i doubt i can get the min CCC. i need 3Cs at least to qualify for my reward. need it real bad cause i've got 0 income right now.

NEW SHOTS

2007-07-23T07:33:00.001-07:00

Uploaded some shots onto http://fotologue.jp/myheaven.
will upload more soon.

LOVED

2007-07-19T06:28:00.001-07:00

Gatorade and McVitie's are my current love. They taste damn good!

Gatorade powder available at leading departmental store at price ranging from 10.15 to 10.50. They come in limited supply or rather seasonal. Once they are out of stock it usually take quite a while before they are restocked. So go grab them now!

Now this is currently one of the promotional items at Sheng Shiong supermarket at bedok central. Has become a member of the cheapo community and has periodically pop in to look for bargains=D Finally i am learning to scrimp which i think is good cause Savings=Y - expenditure!=P Anyway these biscuits taste really good and they are going for 3.60 usually but now at 2.95 you can have 2 packets of them! Its really a great deal but however do look out when shopping at Sheng Shiong if you do remember to check the expiry date of the items as some of them are really near and that explain for the incredibily low prices. i.e the biscuits i bought expires in september but most likely i will finish them including the 4 packets i bought today in less than a week! Glutton me=)

Cleared all of my make-up PE which are the 1st 2 that i had in my 2 years and most likely be the last 2 unless i can't wake up and reach school late again. Practically had PE everyday of this week as i had forgotten to bring my PE shorts on monday which amounts to PE plus an extra make-up PE. Hurray!=_= So make up for it the next day and did some simple excercises which to my delight aren't too heavy and wednesday had PE again which again wasn't too shiong! I am a lucky kid what to do?=) then cleared the last of them today which is 6 rounds around the track. Felt like crap while running cause didn't warm up at all then chiong straight down to the track. My back where the kidneys are approximately located hurt like fuck while running which is normal as i tend to straighten my back while running which i hardly do. Guess what. I didn't walk at all! My stamina is indeed increasing! well can't compare to my good glorious fit days...Ran additional 4 rounds to try out my pace and 125 seconds per lap for 4 laps feel like no sweat at all! Although that is nothing to most, given my weight and the long period of time i had been depriving myself of cardiovascular exercises which caused my pulse to increase to 80+ per min vs below 60 a few years ago!Damn i am damn damn damn fat.....the 4 laps felt good cause no more backache so warm up is indeed important and going to push for below 110 which i think i could before going in for NS. 1st time in my life had i felt that running is enjoyable and i will run more. After having PE everyday for the pass few days i do feel abit of my old self. Being more alert and energetic aside, i didn't wake up late in the morning but i end up leaving home last no less=D genius right?

End of week 3 marks the start of my death. prelim pushing forward, german prelim oral pushing forward and german prelim. All these constantly remind me that the real deal i nearer than i imagine. My body isn't up with my mind anymore cause whenever i feel like studying i feel damn tired. Something is very wrong with me. This has never happened to me before! Where has the me who can sit there and have solid study for many hours without break!!! ARGGG! German suck balls big time! Slack too much and realise i have too much to cover but luckily my mother didn't blame me and has agreed to engage a tutor for me but 1st i need to find 1=_= there aren't that many around to begin with.

LONG TIME NO POST!!!!

2007-07-16T05:04:00.000-07:00

yay! finally decided to revive my blog=D
after my failed green template which almost everyone says is ugly, hasn't been in the mood to blog at all.hasn't add in a tagboard yet. so in the meantime there is the comment thing at the end.

070707- IT'S ALL BOUT LIVE EARTH
the rock concert that covers 7 continients with much controversy

catched the opening at the outdoor screening outside plaza singapura. not say alot of people and the atmosphere doesn't have the "live earth" feel. nevertheless, heard some really cool bands.

this is Abingdon Boys School if u haven't already know them. lead singer is actually T.M revolution. this is their pv not from live earth. the one from live earth damn low quality.

and of course the much beloved Linkin Park which sadly suck on 070707 especially chester.

not forgetting the pop diva. Madonna. she really rock

on a more serious note, people have been saying how my taste suck or that its weird.
now this is an example of what i think is chio. ya so stop saying that i've got weird taste or that my taste suck alright=D

so my definition of chio is not that weird right? so pple. stop suaning me k? =)
oh btw. i donno this chio bu. it just a random pic off friendster

Déjà Vu

2006-12-06T17:55:00.000-08:00

Everyone has experienced the unsettling mystery of déjà vu - that flash of memory when you meet someone you feel you already or recognize a place you've never been before. But what if the feelings were actually warnings sent from the past or clues to the future? It is that very sensation that guides ATF agent Doug Carlin (Denzel Washington) through his latest investigation. From the director of Domino and the producer of Tristan & Isolde Tony Scott, Déjà Vu who will blow you away with the intense sequences and excellent screenplay by Denzel Washington with the inner relationship of Doug Carlin.

Do you believe in Déjà Vu? I do. I always get images of the future in my dreams that really comes true. Like whether an exam paper is hard, exact scene that i will have in my life later and the freakiest of all i can dream of exact topic for exams occasionally and that topic is really 冷门 and everybody thought that it would come out much so for a practical. I don't think this happens because i am guided by my dreams in my life as i am quite a random person. I can all of a sudden do things that are unacceptable to most. So am i guided by my dreams or is it Déjà Vu?

Haven't got nothing much to do these days so spent most of my time wandering around town. That seem to spark of some inspiration for a series of shots. Hopefully i will have it done soon and that it comes out not too far off from what i have in mind.

During the course of my wandering, met quite a few acquaintance. Somehow this makes me think that what another acquaintance said about me is quite true. She said that i am friendless and i am a loner. From my wandering almost everyone on the street are in pairs or groups except me. Most would think that being " friendless" is damn sad but i think otherwise. Yes you do plenty of monkey business together and you waste lots of time waiting for your fellow monkeys who alway comes late. When the monkeys decide to eat, watch movie, play lan you wait longer than others cause monkeys are always in a bunch and don't wan to be separated. So the monkeys continue waiting until other monkeys leave. With so many monkeys in town, the bananas aren't enough to go around so the monkeys would have to continue waiting until they get their bananas. That's a lot of time wasted isn't it?

恭喜发财 i typed this far with a lousy keyboard with a "D" that is not functioning and a "ctrl" which will self activate. How nice...

勤有功，戏无益。戒之哉，宜勉力

2006-11-10T21:29:00.000-08:00

finally got time to finish up my blog template. currently in love with camo so that explain the greeness.=D

From my previous post i've said that poor people do not deserved to be sympathise. My reason behind is i believe that the world is fair. Those who work hard get rich or at least a decent life, those who only do the "i am poor" chant deserve to stay that way. If you've got so much time to chant why not use that extra bit of time thinking how to earn a buck more? Take for example a family friend. He didn't even finish his o'lvl and his english is as good as the sign board in Singapore. Guess what. He is my dad's boss. From his verbal recount, he started as just a machinery operator. Then he was v.hardworking so he was promoted to supervisor and that's it. He never got promoted again. So he work hard and he scrimp and saved up a considerable sum of money over time. Then he met his opportunity. He was approached by another to set up a construction firm together with him operating the machines and supervising the banglahs. And deng, he is now my dad's boss.

Such stories are all over the place. If u ask around most bosses started out poor. Its hardworkingness that pays as the older say. Some may argue that alot of those bosses just take over what is left by their ancestors. If they didn't continue to put in effort into it, will it last?

So i still firmly believe that the poor doesn't deserve to be pitied. Not a single cent will come out of my coffer to them. Its their own fault that they are poor. There are jobs with reasonable pay and don't need much qualifications. Like garbage truck driver. They are paid 3k per month after allowance before CPF contribution. That not too bad isn't it? Its not dangerous just plain stinky. Since they are really poor, will they find such money stinky?

Try finding where this shot is taken. U will never imagine it there

Love birds all over esplande at nite.

muahahha

2006-10-20T06:48:00.000-07:00

i am promoted! yay~
onli screwed up chemistry by missing pass by 1 mark.
i got an A tis time round. damn surprised. i was only aiming for a pass.
i still believe that i am a lucky ass. when i am at my wit's end, something will definately happen.

A thought that came to my mind recently. poor people doesn't deserve sympathy. will explain why i feel this way in my next post. this is gonna be the last post i have until i revamped my blog.

a personality test i've done.

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

randomised feeling

2006-10-05T07:11:00.000-07:00

finished maths paper. kinda done for. all of a sudden everything that i revised somehow just jumbled up together. i have no idea to do anything. luckily i saw the light close to the last min. like 30 mins before the paper end. all of a sudden recalled how to do another 2 questions. as in 2 whole questions not just parts. not bad right? i consider myself quite a blessed person. i am born with having unlimited milk to drink and all the food that i wan. that sort of explain my size. just to let those who are reading noe. i drink about 1litre of milk per day before sec 4. after that can't really be bothered to drink but whenever i drink, i drink like its free or wat and i don't use the cup=D

somehow felt that as a person aged/as society improves, his or her desire for branded stuff increases proportionately aka direct relationship. its like when one is younger, who cares wat brand of clothes u are wearing. last time where got say "mummy i wan that size 3 nike shoe". even babies now are wearing nike and they cost 80 bucks a pair. but nvm. i too am a sucker for branded stuff. everything i use i will want it to be branded except for clothes. so its good that i can blame it on the society and not myself=X

let's see wat branded stuff i have...specs, wallet, shoes, mp3, hifi and i can't be bothered to write anymore. sometime when i think about it. i wonder why am i paying so much more for stuffs that are made in china no matter with the brand or not.

some of the photos that i have taken a while ago. all without CSing. somebody commented that the white balance is off. what i got to say is that the warmer tone brings out the mood that i wan the photos to carry. photography is a form of art not just replicating the actual scene all the time. it should include what the photographer actually feels and the atmosphere around him when he is taking the shot. that's what i think. i donno what u think and i don really care.

i am dead...

2006-10-04T15:48:00.000-07:00

realised i am failing maths today. didn't had enough practice and i still donno what i know or donno. the worse part is that i guess what i donno is more than what i know. see me in 05/07

2006-10-02T18:07:00.000-07:00

came across this advert while looking for anycall advert. classic.

anyway i always find that pepsi has got better advert that coke...

my floor...

2006-09-30T01:08:00.000-07:00

that my floor...i got everything there. from papers to books to magazines to bags and even shower foam. that's how i always study. isn't that facinating? btw. how many table legs do u see there? i got 3 tables i got 2 1.5m ones and a 2.5 m. i donno what for but i am still complaining that i don have enough space on the tables.

if i fail to promote. i guess it would be the doing of my new aquarium...spent too much time on it
not forgetting money too.

2006-08-20T04:19:00.000-07:00

had a crazy week. sleep onli max 5 hours per day. also donno what i busy with. hai~

had pw meeting yesterday. did nothing much as usual. then had dinner with daryl. carl's jr. assume 1 cup of 16oz drink cost $1, then daryl and i each onli paid $1.40 for a famous star and 1 pack of fries. the meal cost $7.40. do the sums and u will noe how much we drank to make our money worth while. that guy still say 1 fries 1 cup. if we reali did that, i think we will die there.

2006-08-12T06:46:00.000-07:00

I've a pair of tickets to tonight's firework festival on the roof garden at esplanade. i went.quitenice.much better than singapore's. but the atmosphere there was so boring that i left immediately after it ended. its filled with all the older people and there is nobody i know of. now with this mad rush of people around the mrt station, my mood become even worse. am i loner or wat. guess i figured out that answer long time ago.

Precious.

2006-08-12T03:18:00.000-07:00

Nice song here. with nice footage from umizaru 1 and 2. takes a while to load

here are some of the photos of firework i took on tues.

and some city scape while waiting for my fren to meet me in town.

i love visa.

2006-08-05T00:44:00.000-07:00

my day started today as per my normal saturday morning. waking up late and going for pw meeting late. damn. what's wrong with me? why can't i ever be on time? alright completed my part of the wr in no time then hang around for awhile for the free internet. ohya. the promo at mac where u buy 1 extra value meal and u get 1 item for free is damn cool lah. love it but the coupons like onli appeared for a short while. anyone noes where to get them please tell me k?

Umizaru II. finally watching it today. damn funny lah. i booked a ticket onli for the 5.10pm show. then i went down to get my ticket at around 2. then 15.10 i went to enter the theatre thinking its 5.10pm. how smart rite? the auntie also nv stop me. then i went to theatre 5. to my surprise, its showing ask the dust. a R21 show. i went to ask the auntie. then she say its onli 3.10 now mah. lol. and she let me in leh! wah lao. should just stayed there and watch. next time can try. liddat damn value adding. oh yes. i love visa. i used online booking to book my ticket. i went down to the cathay. the queue is like at least 10 people long at lvl 1. i went up to lvl5 as usual. 5 people queueing. i go straight to online booking counter. no queue. got my ticket in less than 1 min. and at a discounted price. all UOB visa cardmember. there is a discount for us! wahahha.

so i got 2 more hours to spare. proceeded to mac at PS to blog. so here i am. infront of me. is 1 pair of lesbo. 1 v.chio. i chubby chubby de. sit there eating fries and the other hand keep fondling each other's hand. wahhaha abit gross lah. then another pair. also 1 chio 1. the other 1 quite yandao. tis 1 not so bad but 1 look already noe is lesbo. then i keep staring at them then they buay tahan and change seat. whahaa reali don understand why all the lesbo all so chio 1. that is bad news for all guys i guess.

photo of the day. shot using my handphone.

lost for a while.

2006-07-28T07:14:00.000-07:00

this entry is dedicated to my iron uncle.

a little history of my iron uncle. he has been with us for 12 years. when he was just born, my mum worked hard with him to help him adopt 4 big and strong children. 3 14ft children of brand mitsubishi and a 20ft child of brand daihatsu. they are all under my mum's company. looking at my iron uncle. he is just 10ft long and he managed to earn enough to feed his 4 larger children. he is a great man. not only did he feed his 4 children, he also fed my sis and i.

i used to feel embarassed going around in my iron uncle. i think its a disgrace to ride in a lorry. today, my mum smsed me to ask me to hurry down from 3rd lang. its was the final ride on the iron uncle. he is going to the scrap yard tomorrow. 2 other small uncles are going with him on his final journey. another 2 will follow in their father's footstep and help others like what iron uncle helped my mum achieved. we gathered at a coffee shop. together for the final time. eating and drinking merrily. tomorrow it will all come to an end. end of my life of lorries and warehouse.

its all my fault. if i had agreed to learn transport management, they wouldn't have to go. at least during my free time i could have helped out my mum. she has been complaining that she is tired. she wants me to take over. i didn't want to. now that its time to say goodbye, i can't help swallowing tears in my throat. i kept asking my mum the same question. " Are they really going to be gone tomorrow?" over and over again. i get the same reply. they will dissappear from my life tomorrow.

goodbye my iron uncle. my dearest uncle who has accompanied me through 12 years of my life. how about a minute of silence for my iron uncle.

我是一只咸鱼

2006-07-10T06:28:00.000-07:00

An extract from a song that i recently like alot.

我是一只咸鱼不想承认也不能否认，
不要同情我笨又夸我天真还梦想著翻身。
咸鱼就算翻身还是只咸鱼输得也诚恳，
至少到最後我还有咸鱼不腐烂的自尊。
我没有任何天分，我却有梦的天真。
我是傻，不是蠢，我将会证明用我的一生。
我如果有梦 , 有没有错。
错过才会更加明白明白坚持是什么。
我如果有梦 , 梦要够疯。
够疯才能变成英雄总会有一篇我的传说。

Somehow i feel that this song is describing my life. hai~
i am a salted fish.

muahah today feel super high after imming with my mama today's evening. pushing a trolley around seems to be a good way to destress. wait...i what the hell am i stress with? nothing.
can't seem to find out what is that invisible force that is pressing upon me. trust me i feel stress over things but i can't seem to know what the hell that is stressing me out. that force is reali formidable.

oh man...oh mann

2006-06-27T22:27:00.000-07:00

i guess i made a big mistake in helping boss out during my june holiday. now i kinda lost interest in studying. was thinking perhaps i should like boss suggested go get my instructor cert and teach diving instead. well the pay is okay...and its fun. that idea somewhat cause chaos inside my mind. study boring, teach diving fun. wth...

other than teaching diving, i guess i would be more interested in setting up a store or wat than to study. i had this crazy idea of setting up shops to sell stuff and quit sch. damn...its studying reali such a chore that i simply lost interest in it?

going mad over books. tml last day of torture. well if...if i didn't quit sch after that...hmmm i guess i will stop sleeping in lecture and finish all my tutorials=) last minute again and i think u might see me on the headline in those crap chinese newspaper..those gossipy ones.

i kinda gave up on myself.

2006-06-26T12:34:00.000-07:00

its 3.30 am now. i got maths paper and gp later. i haven even studied half of maths. i just couldn't sit down and study wholeheartedly. i feel like crying but i can't seem to let my tears flow out. the feeling is like ur tear duct are all active but the outlet is stuck or wat. damn.

i really hope this jct will be a lesson learn for me to stop slacking. i took things too lightly. i seriously did.

damn...

2006-06-23T19:40:00.000-07:00

Damn you JCT...u are driving me nuts. i haven't studied at all and i am having chemistry on mon, maths and gp on tues, not forgetting physics and the much hated econs on thursday. arrrg! i still got german class on wed and fri lah...my poor "free days". too bad. made up my mind to work hard for german.( made up my mind but whether action is taken is another concern=X)

1 month of total slacking and enjoyment. now its time to pay the price.

one thing that reali makes me wonder. shouldn't i be freaking tanned after clocking 20+ dives this month? summore i swam quite alot this holiday and i am still not dark.

rrrrahh(copy natalia) no choice muz study like there's no tomorrow for jct. some pple say hard work pays. i nv reali ever worked hard consistantly b4. maybe its time for me to start working hard or should i continue being laisser faire?

quoted from dear mr "passer-by", "and even if u dun get the post u really wanted, it doesn't mean u can be selfish." okay here's my take. if i cannot get wat i wan from it wat for do i have to share sumthing that is outside of my "job description".(actually i am not dissapointed at getting my current post lah. just that i am suppose to empty the dustbin? wth. i might as well work part time as a cleaner. at least i am paid) i am not being jealous or wat. i just felt injustice for that fact a guy of such quality can be put in the place of chairman. there are others in the society who has better quality? or at least others who have done concrete stuff other than him who just talk and talk and talk. what have he done i dare ask. and face it lah, people in the world are selfish. tried being nice to people and they take me for a sucker.

okay. here is my new com.=) perhaps due to the stress from jct, will go on another shopping spree to accesorise my dull looking computer. perhaps go clubbing next weekend? clubbing anyone?=D

muahaha i like things big!!!=P but not everything=D

2006-06-22T07:21:00.000-07:00

alright. today is one of the days where i sleep late and woke up early. went for a swim at yck...daddy not home and i don wan waste cab money to sicc. swam around 10 laps wan to die liao. thinkin of going off. just then, a char bor in pink bikini came in. woot! swim 2 more lap. realise eeee...is old de lor. wan to leave again. go drink water 1st. then 1 around my age 1 come. wah quite chio leh. muahahah swam another 20 laps. men perform better with attention.=X saw her there a few times liao. another siao 1 swim at noon de=P

then went town to get my earphone. damn. i realise when i look at girls, the 1st thing i would look at is the boobs. then go up the face. if chio or not bad then scan to the toe. so hao se rite? wat to do...my brain is all polluted. worse than water source in africa.

photog, wanted to post for some time liao. damn unhappy with who became the chair. tat guy onli came for 2 meetings, camp come for like a few hours then be chair liao. wah lao. damn unhappy with it but wat to do? since i got so many contact with other pple in other photog,i shall be selfish and not share it with him=).i realise i noe at least 1 person in almost every jc's photog and in some poly as well. wat for share it with photog when i am given the role quarter master? ask me empty rubbish bin. damn. seriously i am not jealous of him or wat. just felt that this guy is crap lah, think photog is going down under him. blardy indonesians. btw in case u donno, i don like indons. natural disaster struck them for a reason. more tsunami, earthquakes , eruption and internal conflicts! muhahaha regret donating 2000 bucks for the tsunami relief effort.

waahha...abit happy abit sad. muz kuku liao my brain

2006-06-20T07:47:00.000-07:00

guess what. i opened the text box for more than 1 hour before i actually start to write anything=P try beating that

Well, i guess everything in my life has been going on pretty well this holiday. prepare for SYPA, diving at various location, getting my advance open water diver cert for free, getting a FM2, getting a new com and best of all a tusa regulator! however life is never smooth sailing. they ought to be some hiccups. first of all, i guess my dad can wipe his ass clean and prepare for some jail time=) second seeing a girl whom seriously resembles the girl who i fancy like crazy in the past(though i still do now) in bikini with a guy who is seriously uglier than me and i dare say fatter than me at YCK swimming pool.ARRGGGGGG i am seriously god damn affected by that. somehow didn't want to go back there to swim even though that's one of my favourite swimming pool.only second to the one in SICC to me.

alright after looking thru 4 months of accounts of my mum's business in malaysia my eyes when wild. damn. no wonder my mum need to have a nap before driving me to boss's shop where i am supposed to wait for a customer that nv came. then i went to sim lim to settle my com. its the blardy driver that cause that pink/red line. the jie jie at chamoxa say, pink line nice wat. then i told her damn distracting when playing game lah then she laugh....she is damn pretty lah! damn fair lor and got figure some more she is wearing those low cut 1. wah shiok. haha then the technician is her bf i guess. they keep bickering and their actions make me think that way. what a bless guy. then tat jie jie damn nice lah. i saw got sell fan not. then she say $15 she go other shop help me buy. come back the box sticker write $24. she went over to fuwell to help me get. haaha dealer price leh! then i also bought a set of speakers lah. i saw ban leong's price list. rrp is $89. dealer price is $69. chamoxa's price $79. she also discount me $75. damn nice rite? haha

yeah@ germany won costa rica 3-0. kolse scored 2 and podolski scored 1

haha...long time since an entry

2006-06-07T04:47:00.000-07:00

muahahha. its holiday and my com go kaboom. how nice can it get man! yay new com=X

aniwae i am now in love with swimming. its a great cardio workout and you don't even have to sweat! the best part, seeing hot babes swimming=P woooo! but that would have to depend on your luck man... i have been pretty lucky at yck i guess. at least one chio / hot chick everytime i am there. yeah man. that's my life=D

is a nice movie. i really like it alot. my life is somehow similar to that bloody racecar.
got lots of emotion after watching it but when i try to write it down here...nothing comes out...=_=

june holiday. half gone soon and i haven even touch any of my lecture notes! shit i am dead.
hopefully i can do miracle again like i always do. 10 points for o'lvl by studying 2 weeks b4 it. jumping from C6 from emaths and D7 for amaths for prelim to A1 for emaths and A2 for amaths by studying for it 3 weeks b4 o'lvl...100 sets of papers man. i almost died. really hope that i can glue my big fat ass to the chair and mug like hell. i don wanna end up dieing last min like i did for o'lvl. i sacrificed my sleep for 2 weeks...trying to make up lost time to study. 2 weeks of o'lvl with onli sleep on weekends...hah. a'lvl will i do that again? hopefully not. looking at the damn textbook i think i will die..Giancoli and Ben Bernarke looking at me and nodding their head showing me their thickness. sigh*

heavy head

2006-05-12T10:27:00.000-07:00

pretty much deprived of sleep these few day. life pretty much the same and not at all exciting for me. i am back to the old me in sec sch i guess.hai~

there is all these colin and kero shit going on now and some other gay couples. i think these people simply got nothing better to do lah. they don't look gay at all. i guess they are just trying to get attention and hopefully get famous?

pretty much broke these few days. due to me exceeding my budget last week to develop my crap photos, i was in debt. heng clear liao but no money for this weekend. no money=stuck at home and be mummy good boy=X

wahahahha. all of a sudden decided to sms a gal i used to like alot de and ask how is she. somehow i don think she is pretty anymore leh. saw some photos with her inside and i think my taste sux.why the hell do i like her? perhaps she looks prettier in person? my memory of her now is v.vague liao.=X okay lah i am a sucker for looks but somehow all the gals the i ever like hor, also not say chio or wat 1 leh=D. hai~ wahahah and she finally got msn liao. wahhaha. oh if u happen to be reading this then hi to u=).

some shots taken during netball match. RJ's netballer are the chioest! wahahha. but somehow photography is more attractive to me than looking at them. aniwae go tj's netballer!aj deserve to lose muahahah=X

sports photography is hard. hai~ too noob

lazy to think of topic

2006-05-06T04:57:00.000-07:00

haven't been able to post anything for a long time. busy with school work, taking photos and also hanging out a little too much i guess=X somehow my social circle is getting smaller and smaller but somehow i am going out more than ever=P

Election ar election. L&L corp. sure win 1 mah. i am really impressed by the opposition throwing up so many candidates this time round. alot of people have been passing comments that they are of sub-standard quality. how can one judge their ability to be a MP when they have never been one? also by using their qualification as a guideline i feel is very impractical. people who excel in their academic area need not have the calibre to lead. this is the case where some of the politician in 1st world countries actually do not have any academic achievement like in the case of germany where one can enter politics because he or she posses a skill to earn a living.

however i have to agree that some of the opposition members need to improve on their grooming, especially the older and less well known ones. their hair is in a mess in their publicity shots. there is this OM that i especially want to highlight. the youngest one. 26 years old graduated from ITE and a malay. although he does not have the academic acheivements of the ruling party members, at least he carries himself well. that i think is very important as human always pass their first judgement on the a person base on his or her looks.

can't really say out all my opinions of the GE here.( i do not wish to be detain by the ISA or being sued by L&L corp)

Life: somehow as one get older, time seems to pass by faster and faster. the pace of life also speed up. and this is certainly a sad thing as man certainly do not have the mood to endear all the beauty of the world with such hectic lives. perhaps one should once in a while slow down his pace and sit by the road side and observe quietly from another perspective. most adults are stuck in this rat race for riches and better life. they think that might pleases them. think again! no man can earn the whole world. u will just spend your whole life working like a dog and being paid peanuts while some of the riches man in the world sit by drinking 200000 a bottle red wine from the profits u have earn for him for he pays u a few k per month. why not pamper yourself a little and rest at time to enjoy the beauty of the world and the lives of people. sometimes i really think that ignorance is bliss. the next time u see any "gong kia" around, look at them. are they laughing away while u stare at them? look at kids. they can be happy just for a sweet. perhaps all the advancement in technology in life should be taken away. let us go back to basic and maybe we can find the true meaning of life.

wahhahahah shall spoil my blog with my ugly photo while drinking green tea with kelvin at mac outside lido

really wonder why i look so happy today. i haven done my tutorials! my maths file is not ready yet...die liao le and i am still looking so happy today. muahahahah

many many different thoughts

2006-04-21T07:30:00.001-07:00

today handed in my PI 4th draft. got it back on the spot cause v.few pple in class nothing to do also. then cher mark liao return. not much of a problem other than my feasibility totally do wrongly. then after tat suppose to have sports day. i pon it as expected=). ask kelvin come out but donno where one to go so i just told him i go home sleep lah. but take mrt halfway, i automatically alighted at somerset. spent quite some time thinking of wat movie to watch for pleasure not for work. was deciding among 3 films. art of seduction which i watched for work already, the sentinel and firewall. finally decided to watch a thriller, the sentinel. quite empty as usual.( i love it tat way) but its like its friday! when i was back in sec sch, town is damn crowded on fridays 1 lah. aniwae the sentinel i feel was v.well done. every aspect of the film is very well thought out and filmed. the characters have got enough space to develop and it interests u at everypoint of the movie. i bear with my pee until i cannot bear with it any longer then chiong i shot go toilet.=X haha i give 4-4.5 out of 5. Harrison ford reali zai ar~. old is old liao but still damn pro. another thing i like about ths film is that it is realistic. harrison ford run liao will tired rest awhile then continue=P a v.nice touch i muz say. and this movie has got feelings v.well expressed though not directly.

watch finish liao go walk walk look at magazine. saw plently of pair today as well=( haha did affect my mood a little. then on my way home, a pleasant looking girl around my age i guess walk into the mrt. caught her eyes on me. then she look somewhere else. but throughout the journey she kept on turning her glance from her phone to me and back. (okay i was looking at her so i noe she was looking) am i reali that big, fat and ugly that kenna this kind of glancing? or izzit my ugly uniform? maybe its both hor? whahahaha hai~ and the weird thing is that. she alighted at sembawang. she didn't alight immediately though. she move front abit. stop. door open. look at me again. then her face look sad donno why then walk out slowly but purposefully. always kenna glaced at by pple alighting at sembawang. donno why.hai~

then hor...i am reali pissed. i hate free loader. i can't stand the thought of them. and i hate pple giving dumb excuesses that they have to work. so wat? ur job as a student is to study not to work. if u work, u should ensure that it doesn't affect ur study life and affect others because u can't make it for project just because u need to work. i work too. and my job is some sophisticated some more. damn pissed...long time since i post photos...shall post some when i got the money to develop my photos..

many many different thoughts

2006-04-21T07:30:00.000-07:00

time machine...that's wat i wan

2006-04-18T04:08:00.000-07:00

my post has nothing really much to do with the topic today. feeling very randomised again.
watched Eight Below today. felt that the movie does not do the story plot justice. its wasn't as good as expected. i am onli giving it 3.5 stars out of 5. watched the original story from japan some time ago. felt the japanese version portrayed the bond of the characters with the dogs better. not really worth watching though. MI:3 opening soon. has this feeling that it is not as good as its predecessors. got tickets to watch special screening b4 opening but gave the tickets away. no time to watch. 7.30 tml hai~ class just end how to appear just in time for it?

bought tis on monday. went over to MS after lesson cause mama no cook. Ate Carl's jr then go times llss. then saw tis. like the cover so buy straight without thinking. luckily it magazine was not bad. quite like the stuff inside but its 6 bucks fo 68 pages leh....so thin onli. some more i bought a backdated copy. it doesn't matter. i enjoyed it so much that i onli realised that it is march's issue only after i finish going through the whole magazine. decided that i am going into film for the time being. no money buy dslr. after using the sch's d70 realise that using digital doesn't train up skill. u onli keep snapping onli. the only thing that i actually like about digital is that i dare to do manual. slr i do manual can...until i buy my film developing canister then say.

Sch was hell today. muahaha reached sch at 8.27am. college start at 7.20. actually can make it to sch by 7.50 1. but decided to go mac drink milo read my TODAY first. if i reach sch by 7.50, i will still be booked and still will be late for pe and the pe teacher donno will make me do push up or wat. so just skipped it all. as usual no homework is done. same for tonight. tml got german. my online learning stuff all still haven't do lah i am so dead. hai~

the day after my birthday.

2006-04-15T22:40:00.000-07:00

yesterday was my birthday. spent it with a guy. how interesting right?=X

went shopping for clothes at bugis before proceeding to town. bought plenty of clothes.can't show them here cause my camera is now flying from taipei back to singapore.=P then of course muz go iggi and sunday to see clothes lah. wah...iggi the girl who look damn mature but still preparing for o'lvl not there. instead was a 20+ or early 30 char bo. english damn hiong. but still can speak chinese 1. service damn good. but i didn't buy anything. last time buy clothes from there wash 1 time spoil liao. so she discount for kelvin lor. then go sunday. bought a tee from there...after trying my tee came out then got 2 girl stop by. got 1 not bad 1. the other 1 average. then they flip thru the ladies top. then the prettier 1 asked me. 这个多少钱？ with a v.cute accent. then i point to the auntie. then her face damn pai seh lah. then i say 我像是买衣服的吗？
then kelvin and me laugh=X we damn bad lah. then auntie say $19. then i ask auntie. 为设么女孩子的比较便宜？是不是应为布比较少？then auntie saay is because girls normally buy alot at one go so she discount more lor. but think that girl too pai seh to buy liao look for a while then walk off liao. then after which i said to kelvin. after auntie say $19 i should have said if u gimme ur phone number $10 can liao. wahhaha. reali she is cute and chio. looks like typical chij girl to me.

yesterday i was a little not myself. really buy clothes on impulse 1. 4 tees in total. go freshbox hor...see i quite like 1...take...try...pay...without asking how much=X so fast that kelvin kenna stunned...he asked. buy liao aR? then i say ya lor. then bought 1 shirt last time i see i like but no size 1 at $6. clearing stock i guess. last time sell $19.

then after which we realised that we bought so many tees without any shorts. but couldn't find any that we like. actually i saw a few which i fancy. but no size. think the shrots are signalling to me to lose weight lah. wahahha

then go town find makan...at first is say wan eat marche. then kelvin like don reali like the food lah. then sakae need queue. billy bomber donno why don eat. pizza hut..lazy walk to lucky plaza. end up eating pepper lunch at taka. i guess i wouldn't eat there again. not reali nice. think i cook at home 1 nicer leh.serious

die tutorial nv as usual. and mon still got chem test...siao liao lah...

nothing to say

2006-04-03T04:50:00.000-07:00

i got nothing much to say. my photos shall tell u my feelings

That's me...
Metallic figurine in TJ

Singapore fashion show roadshow. manequine at MS
Jeans of another manequine
Leaf at Istana park

weird

2006-03-25T06:11:00.000-08:00

its really unlike me to post twice a day but hack lah. went down to suntec to take a look at german expo. my real intention was to go to adidas. got 2 new sling bags and 1 actually fancy one of them. hopefully queensway will have it by next week. going down on tuesday i guess. saturday too crowded for my liking. hai~ should have been more active there if not can just call them to ask if they have that model anot.

CHINA MODELS SUX!!! they look like shit and look damn dao lah. basket why the german fashion show has to use china model of all the asian models? perhaps made in china 1 cheaper lah hor?

SYPA- Singapore Young Photographer Awards
it will be my first ever entry. requirement is 6 8R or S8R photos. have to cover at least 4 genre. need a decent camera to take photos of high quality to print 8R. hai~ muz say bye bye to my $ again. can't be bothered to borrow camera from the school. only got 3 dslr to go around when there are so many members. think i will just rent a 20D or D1H from clubsnap bah. but first i need to save up for it. 2 weeks should be enough. for the next 2 weeks u will see me eating bread and drinking plain water. not that bad actually lah. still will have money to eat

My plans.
going to cut down on my weight by running and limiting my daily intake. gonna tone up by going to the sch gym. anyway it's free so why not=P then gonna get some chicks after reaching my desired weight and shape. guess muz at least wait till end of year liao bah. realised that singapore got plenty of hot chicks to go around but somehow i don get 1. *sob*

something happened on the mrt while i was on my way to city hall. something that made me a little happy but i wouldn't post it here. muahahah

afraid

2006-03-24T19:12:00.000-08:00

that what i am feeling these whole week. my family is crumbling. my studies is a wreck. my social life? do i even have it in the first place. i realise i have change alot since sec 4. i changed from someone with friends to someone who exist only in his own little world. now i am even a little afraid of myself. due to the circumstances around me now, i am also afraid that i can't reach the goal that i have. i am afraid of falling especially when i have my goal set so high. if i fall, it would be extremely painful and that might as well be the end of me.

i was not like that. i don't really experience the feeling afraid. perhaps it was ignorance on my part or maybe i have become a coward. i don't have the practice of walking behind people but nowadays i am doing it more and more. why is this so? my prolong solitude? or i simply lost my sense of self confidence? it's wierd that sometimes i feel i am lost for words when i am thinking of what to say in my mind. but when i am faced with a situation where i need to say what i think and what i want to get something, it just flows out. just like that. no prior thinking and it doesn't sound crappy as the comments that i usually give when i don't think. (if u noe me, most of the time i don't use my brain)

haven post for a long time. feel like posting some pictures. they are all from the sentosa photography outing.

musical fountain using D70 without a tripod.

merlion with my A80

thought of this shot at the southern most tip of donno what. nice? i think will be better if the rays are more intense.

lost.

2006-03-15T03:04:00.000-08:00

right now i am feeling so lost. i donno what do i want. maybe due to the afternoon nap which is considered an abnormality for me. for those who don't know i don nap unless i am sick.

okay came back from german camp. after being in moelc for the 5th year, this is the first time i ever slept in moelc before. During the night spent there, i found out alot of shocking fact about moelc. The place is rats infested, mosquitoes attacking human at random and ants crawling all over the place at night. That is the place we spent 5 years studying our third languages and where i spent my night yesterday. It was quite fun. But i can't exactly say why i is it fun.

Was really sad on monday. Went to watch My Girl And I without having my girl being around.hai~ quite long never have my girl liao. muahaha. saw lots of pple whom i know that day. the biggest problem was that they were all in pairs. either they wan me to feel jealous or i am just plain suay, everybody i know that i met on monday came in pairS! wtf...and there was this guy with 3 girls. he tapped me on the shoulder then wave at me. but i donno who he was. nevertheless i smile and just waved back lor. see i am a nice guy. saw teng kiat with a girl, the unknown guy with 3 girls, and still a few more couples whom i know. can't really remember who they were. Was feeling damn fucked up already. my ipod nano spoil again. then went repair center. then some more all the pairs thing i was like. damn lah. why today i am so suay.perhaps god is telling me its time to get another girl?muahahaha~ guess i think too much=D.

oh my fucking god.

2006-03-12T19:33:00.000-08:00

okay.had a good look of myself in the mirror today.tried out my old jersey.damn it. i grew so much fatter.can see tummy buldging out.okay. i am 90.5kg now.orientation lost 2 kg. not bad huh? but in no time i will gain it back.thinking back.i was onli 75kg in sec 3! and my lowest weight in sec 2 was 72kg.from sec 2 till now i only grew say 2.5cm at most.okay lah.to be fair.last time i train 3 times a week.sweat till like shit kind.now.1 week not even once.given my food intake i need to exercise that much to maintain.to lose weight.wah is so damn hard.hmmm nevertheless i shall set myself another goal.lose 5kg in the next term.not losing muscle mass but lose fats.when gym with uncle tat day.wah lost quite alot of muscle mass.and my weight still the same.which means i grow fatter.shall make use of tjc's gym.see next term got free period anot.if got all use to chiong gym.tuesday, thursday and saturday shall be my official gym day.i also need to build up on my stamina.running is in.i can't run now...sec 2 my 2.4 is 10.15. last year i only barely just got a B.that's after a re-run of course. due to my stupid back injury.come to tj.my back injury somehow gone after the first few pe lesson.was still thinking perhaps i need to get Dr Seow to write letter for me. but now don think so animore=D. sunday shall be definate running day. that's my plan. and soft drinks 1 day at most 2 can.that it.mealtime fruit juice,kopi,tei or plain water strictly.looks like my proteins can continue to rot on my cupboard.=X

realised

2006-03-12T03:58:00.000-08:00

Went to ah ho(aaron) kor kor's wedding yesterday.found it a little awkward to call him ah ho kor kor nowadays.sound so wierd.though its meritus mandrian, i find the food below average.Even yum cha serve better food than that. might as well have it at sheraton or mariott since the price is about the same.But that's not my choice.Not only the food suck, the quality of service provided by the waiter were horrendous.Not only the waiters showed no initiative at all in serving us drinks, they were just standing there talking among themselves.Even when i request for services, they were showing me this"bu shuang" look.This is one of the best hotel in singapore(one of the most expensive too) but yet this is the kind of service rendered.But one thing that i really would like to commend on is the great service provided by the captain.Upon seeing my black face he came forward to ask if i needed anything AND with a smile.This is the kind of service that we should expect from a 5 star hotel.A smile can really brighten up a guest's day.Some people reading here might think that i am just making a big fuse over a trivial matter.But what if this is the kind of service rendered to a tourist instead of me? what impression do u think the tourist will have of singapore? That is the reason why the government is also pushing forward the GEMS.Was pretty bored throughout the whole dinner.On my table, there were none of my generation.closest was perhaps jian jiao who is in U now.somehow we got nothing to talk about other than my wish to study brewery in germany.Shu yi and Mark were rather skeptical of my choice.There were worried that given such a specialised B.sc my career choices would be v.limited.Furthermore they were too worried that given that we are asian, the germans might not welcome an asian braumeister to brew beer in germany as brewery is a rather traditional industry in Germany.

the wine glass i used.the beer glass i used.the iced water glass that i used.the chinese tea cup

somehow i felt that it was good for me to leave 14/06.i was having this feeling that i wasn't really a part of them.think most of them didn't like me anyway.but as i have mentioned in my previous post.that's too bad.for i am one of the lucky kid who doesn't really have to worry about their future should they not have a job.cause i will always have a job waiting for me unless my mum go bankrupt.then that's a different story.that kind of mindset cultivated the sense of "dao"ness and what people called poor attitude.aniwae i also don't really like 14/06.i kinda feel transparent when i am with them.as if i am of an inferior status.but seriously speaking.i don think i am any poorer than most of them.what ever they have i too can have.just a matter of whether i wan it anot.To fucked this group of people up.the best way is to score better than them.this is the kind of motivation that i need to score well.somehow i needed this kind of hostile environment in order to perform my potential.given my iq i shouldn't even be in TJ in the first place.(i did went for an IQ test) but i admit that i have low eq. think its due to that the i ended up here.Mr alvin said this"your eq can higher anot" in chinese during one of the orientation days.i felt like smashing his face.But i told myself.no.not worth it to destroy my future.i will not fight.i will let people hit me.then i shall call the police.i already caused one teen to end up having probation already.another one is nothing.revenge? u can try.my house is just at most 200m from the nearest police center.better if u try killing me at my malaysia's old kampong house.i will shoot u dead and i don't even have to go to court for it.

after reading this post, most people will think that i am psychotic.indeed i am.if not i wouldn't dare to dream of 4 distinctions for my 4 H2 subjects. since i can start studying 2 weeks b4 o'lvl and get 10 points, given my iq, if i start now it's definately not a problem.German will be my hardest hurdle to jump through.for i did not really pay much attention to it.and for deciding that i shall take it for a'lvl.somehow even myself think that its suicide. if i gave up german and continue pure geog.i wouldn't be in TJ already.i would be in NJ or VJ at least.rather than blaming the subject.i've decided to challenge myself to overcome this subject which cost me my ideal jc.That's the kind of attitude that i should have instead of feeling down.

Mark my words.by the end of this year.i will beat ms hui ping.mr alvin at least in academic.whenever i aim to beat someone.i always do.

f.up

2006-03-08T19:01:00.000-08:00

damn pissed. mood v.bad. not enough sleep. nv eat breakfast.so i went around fking pple up. and this fker come out and say i wan fight. nb...wan fight come lah. as if i scared. wat's wrong with fighting for my own rights? in tis case the rights of my og. to hell with orientation. totally sick of it. orientation 2 sucks down right to the core. people are not even enthu and ogls still have to act enthu. i am sick of this. i have to admit that pleasing people is not my forte. i am still better at pissing people off.

YESH! i no longer need to see the face of ms hui ping anymore. u wan kao bei pple look at urself 1st. wat the f u think u are? the way i wan to tok to pple is my problem. u not happy just fk off. be thanxful that u are a girl. reali felt like punching keng mun on his face. basket. reali felt like smashing it. but luckily. after so many such encounters, have learnt the art of walking away like a loser. but at least i didn't down my future because of one bloody sucker.

The art of tolerance is reali hard to master. that is something i reali have to work on.

okay i am out of azurous. going in to zeinth. wth. nj rejected me as expected. wahahah too bad then. looks like i have to beat their top scorer in a lvl to get my revenge then. my goal for a lvl. to get distinction for all my H2 subjects including german. GP kinda hard for me to ace given the lousy english that is written here. i think i reali can't get a distinction for it in a lvl. If possible. i reali wan to top the lvl in a lvl and even beat NJ's top scorer. have to start studying like mad now. do i wan my life? obviously i nv had 1. if i have i wouldn't have tis kind of attitude. but thankfully to my wonderful mother. i don have to put up with other people later on in my life to earn my living. how nice is tat? not reali nice. i nv reali tot of taking over and slack the shit out of my life. i wan something exciting. braumeister vielleicht? ich weiss nicht. i wan to be successful like shit and fk pple around me up. i don need u people to succeed. friends. the so called friends. do u think hanging out with them can do u any good in your life? i don reali think so. u are just wasting hours off ur life everytime u go out with them. if u convert tis time to studying. perhaps can jump a few grades. tis might not be true. as in the case of me. the friendless soul in a foreign land.

fked up...

molested.

2006-03-07T05:21:00.000-08:00

okay. i got molested. it all happened on my way home from sch. after leaving kuan hua perhaps for the last time taking mrt today from tj home with him liao. change mrt at city hall. got tis poly look like student. should be same age 1 or at most 1 yr older. smile at her. she smile at me. k. go into mrt. v. squeezy. so i just use 2 hands to hang on to my shoe bag. she stood infront of me. v. crowded. no space to move at all. all of a sudden. felt something brush against my hands. okay its her ass. once it started. it nv stop.and it go left. right. left.right. like on purpose liddat. then got space behind me liao. i quickly siam lah. though i pervert 1 but still hai~v. irritated. then she turn back a little and glance at me. then b4 she alight she smile at me again...wah lao eh. think she got the wrong person liao lah. there is tis guy who reali resembles me in some donno wat poly 1. his fren mistaken me for him once liao. tap my shoulder then harlow asshole. turn around show them 1 blur face. they also show me 1 blur face. then ask if i am him. then i say no. suay like mad. and he lives in the north as well. cause my fren saw him with a girl and thought tat was me. then he come and ask if i got new gf. basket lah. why i got some sucker looking alike with me. some more i am fat, ugly and not at all cute. yucks. tat girl muz be mad or wat. and she is not bad looking. looking back.hmmm her ass is rather nice=X wahaha i siao liao lah

hmmm...untitled as well

2006-03-06T04:54:00.000-08:00

okay. didn't post yesterday so making up for it right now. just bought 救命病栋24小时3.finally finish it yesterday. was reali touched by alot of scenes. made me seriously thought bout life. its that fragile and when disaster strikes. we human are so helpless. that's how minute we are. however, us humans have got feelings for fellow humans and we can make life better for everyone around even when its of the harshest conditions by out small kind acts. perhaps u may not come from a not so well to do family as in my case.But if u happen to pass by the aunty selling flowers in the market. why not just stop by and buy some flowers home for your family? perhaps your mum might say that u are wasting money. but deep in her heart i believe she can feel the love from you and appriciate the effort that you take to get those flowers.

hmmm...kinda not so like me to write such stuff. muz be the temporary effect of the vcd. pple who noe me better sure will say" eh. you okay anot? when did you start having moral?" i admit that i do not have moral most of the time. i never donated to flagday other than getting too fed up with pple constantly asking me for donation so just donate 10cents paste that sticker to fend off the annoyance of those people. there are other terrible things that i have done b4 which are not so convenient to write down here. who knows someone might just hop into my blog and see wat i wrote and call the police and say i racist ar...torture animal ar...those kind of shit.

hmmm been thinking if the way that i spend money is wrong. why all of a sudden? its like yar i know i don think much before spending but recently it somehow struck me that money is hard earned. hmmm think i reali siao liao. was wondering is $9.50 reali worth it anot. should i go watch movie not. basket. if it was in the past. i would hack lah just watch lah. $9.50 onli mah. take cab from sch home also not enough. btw. it cost $18.00 from my sch to my house and i onli took it 3 times so far.

zhang yun got into tj thru appeal. nj didn't call. so i guess i am out. hmm can buy uniform liao. dirty green uniform for 2 years. yipee...yucks.hai~ early wake up for another 2 years. man. why is my life so sad. yar lah i got limited vocabulary lah so no chim words here and there. i got a b3 so that explain all. so stop telling me my english is lousy. i know better.

orientation 2 was a big big big disappointment for me. perhaps i was expecting something more like orientation 1 where almost everyone was freaking enthu. there were lots of people around like me waiting for appeal result or were kicked out of the sch that they wan to go. how sad. but doesn't that gives you the right to not appriciate people like me screaming like lunatic to try to engage u into the programmes? tmd. cheer so hard meh? those people are simply unwilling to give tj a shot. but...as ms.norsheha said. TJ is a v.warm and caring sch. so we shall continue trying to engage those people!

woah. notice this big chio bu in AZUROUS! cg 34. wah chio ar...basket. so desperateness is acting up again. wah lao... she is just the type that i super like 1. tall tall fair fair de and got the great sense of aura around her de(can't describe). tmd. why whichever sch i go to there muz be this type of girl. some more tis 1 hor. in the same cca as the one last time i super like alot 1. think that is my fate lah. to be tormented by only see no touch. if touch liao i sure mati. wat am talking here. sound like some hardcore rapist liddat.

Blog cum photoblog

2006-03-03T06:33:00.000-08:00

Hi guys. Whoever out there that are reading my blog or just happen to hop in. I am officially turning this blog into a blog cum photoblog with immediate effect. This is to start a platform for me to showcase some of my photography work and ur comments are appreciated. However, please be kind in ur comments. Please respect my hardwork spent in producing these photos by not copying them to ur blog or downloading them. worse still claiming that they are yours. For your info, these pictures are taken by film so i do have evidence that i am the rightful owner. If you wish to use my photos please tag me.=)

Some photos

and 1 more for the day=)

2006-02-28T03:27:00.000-08:00

Tuesday. mass PE day. i thought that we will be practising field events for sports day again so ate quite alot for breakfast. It turn out not the case. Supposed to run abit but i guess i end up slacking all the way.=D after PE dance mass dance abit on our own. Wahaha keep forgeting the chicken part for retarded. So retarded. Was contemplating to skip Maths lecture after PE but somehow my class nobody skipping so just tagged along. Hmmm guess that was a good decision made. Mr Loh teaches much better than the previous lecturer. At least he shows attitude to us=X unlike the previous 1 whom i can't even remember his name. How cool...

Then saw Mr Wong( he is v.young) today and he told me u can add in another os for ipod nano to enable it to play video! how cool! but when he showed me how to switch over to the video mode on his nano, i was totally disgusted by the layout of the os and the boot up. So ugly! doesn't fit nano at all=X wahahaa totally obsesed with it now. Yesterday saw him with the super tall girl from TA. Hmmm some how i got this liking for tall girl and i thought she was pretty.=X not forgeting to mention that today i saw him with another TA girl from cedar who joined my OG during orientation. I think she is chio too. i sounded so desperate right? perhaps i am. prolonged period without love and care = me. wahahah long time since i am in love. L.O.V.E what a word. so simple and short yet with such a deep meaning.

Took this photo a few weeks ago on the sch's film cam. Went broke developing the photos=X

another 1.

having Chemistry test tomorrow and here i am updating my blog. some people may think that not having their parents around most of the time is blessed. i think otherwise. staring at the four walls, having the whole place to yourself most of the time isn't as cool as what most would think. It gets pretty boring.

i think i don't crap liao. if not flung another test tml. somehow not really pleased with my style of blogging. think i am somehow talking to myself. like a madman talking to himself.

Tired like mad...

2006-02-27T05:16:00.001-08:00

1st day of the week.

v.tired. lesson all the way. then stay back do pw. then go for fucking ogl dance practice. tmd got 1 bloody bitch keep kao bei kao bu here and there. damn bu shuang. but i do admit some of the scip pple are nice. but not ALL!

think i reali retarded. dance also can't learn. sad. pw haven't do. tutorial haven do. die liao. don care super tired. going to sleep

I am a crab!

2006-02-25T07:06:00.000-08:00

today reali v.song. but abit reluctant to get out of bed. sleep near 00.30 and woke up at 6. then chiong to sch without having breakfast.oh i did hav breakfast. 1 sandwitch. cold cold 1. from the fridge.

wah chum. keep eating more and more. keep telling myself to lose weight but end up eating more. no logic. that's not suprising when i almost everyone says that i am wierd. so my behavior too is not explainable through the usual logic that apply to others. i insist that i am unique not wierd though=)

OGL camp today. that is the "crab" part. i am super red now. reali chao tar. lost my voice. did lots of things there. not reali in the mood today for such group thingy. guess it's because it's saturday. my lone day out. so abit lethargic at first. took awhile to get into the mood. then song bo...super fun. actually i felt like contesting for house master. but since i am hoping that i will leave TJ for NJ, i decided to just sit there and be a spectator. either that or after getting rejected by her some time ago. my ego hasn't regain yet. perhaps is due to that and i can't afford to take setback so i just chicken out though i did indicate that i want to become house master. but nvm. if i do stay in TJ i will try for SC or to become House capt. Treasurer in house com doesn't sound too bad to me either. =P

on my way home. got this philippino couple. i wonder how the guy can stand his wife. as soon as they boarded the train. her mouth nv stop for a split second. and its the typical fast and blabbering type of philippinoes that u see around orchard road. wah reali poor thing. that guy just stood there and listen like an idiot. perhaps love does make one blind. i wonder if i can do that.

that's all for the day.

am i plain stupid?

2006-02-24T05:39:00.000-08:00

hav been thinking alot recently. am i stupid or wat. even my parents question that. 10 points for o'lvl. how sad is that. how easy can tutorials get and i still don do them. how stupid. it's only test and i myself predict that i flunged it. how stupid. most stupid of all have to be me believing wat people tell me. especially girls. when i am ugly.

enough bout my complain...abit cranky now and then. aching all over. stupid gym work. and i have to be stupid enough to decide to go to gym.

think i am really spastic. sitting there alone facing the computer and typing some crap here and knowing that no one bothers to read wat a fat and ugly guy is typing. sad rite? perhaps tat's how i entertain myself.

went for 3rd lang today. kinda wierd at first to have onli 3 people for lesson. but enjoyed it after a while. cause lesson more productive. herr niser reali tried to engage the 3 of us and we did try to use our horribily lousy german to try to converse with him. half a year without german. all my vocabulary gone...grammer gone case...not onli german...english too...my english is from bad to worse...not forgeting chinese...guess i am plain stupid...

my very first post.

2006-02-23T05:51:00.000-08:00

my very first post on this blog...had plenty of blogs b4...but none lasted more than 1 week.
perhaps too long nv touch html and no $ incentive so abit lazy to make it chio chio de=X

wahahha if sux...just keep repeating. how i wish i can get out of this world. jc life kinda starts to bore me...it just keep repeating itself as though i am still stuck in anderson...that shit place.

waaaaahhh~~~ i need to buy new uniform a.s.a.p sia...my shirt from sec 1 wear until now. super short lor
no wonder how i tuck in the front still look extra super short. like abit funny

though about lots of things today on my way back but kinda lazy to type.

was kinda feeling reali lethargic this morning. reali tired from 3rd lang last nite...did some crappy rap in german for class. wah that german guy so nice...some more his chest muscles are like mad! woooh how i wish i had those=P hmmm wrote quite a fast one but can't rap it out...my german too lan...3 line stuck liao. sad~

sian`sation

凯- no header until i got time to make 1

PROJECT WEIGHT LOSS

小不点 阿卡 我

Drink Drank but not Drunk

posting from my itouch

sadded

死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死死

How To Detach A Bra

Mug

NEW SHOTS

LOVED

LONG TIME NO POST!!!!

Déjà Vu

勤有功，戏无益。戒之哉，宜勉力

muahahha

randomised feeling

i am dead...

my floor...

Precious.

i love visa.

lost for a while.

我是一只咸鱼

oh man...oh mann

i kinda gave up on myself.

damn...

muahaha i like things big!!!=P but not everything=D

waahha...abit happy abit sad. muz kuku liao my brain

haha...long time since an entry

heavy head

lazy to think of topic

many many different thoughts

many many different thoughts

time machine...that's wat i wan

the day after my birthday.

nothing to say

weird

afraid

lost.

oh my fucking god.

realised

f.up

molested.

hmmm...untitled as well

Blog cum photoblog

Tired like mad...

I am a crab!

am i plain stupid?

my very first post.

小不点阿卡我